My daughter texted from a frat house. I thought of Jane Doe | Opinion

My daughter texted from a frat house. I thought of Jane Doe Opinion.

Key points

• Rachel Sanders is a 21-year-old college student who posted #IamJaneDoe on her Instagram account this week.
• When Virginia Giuffre Roberts first accused the former Prince Andrew of abuse, she was called a whore.
• Kelly remarked the alleged victim might have "enjoyed" what happened and stated she's "not the most attractive gal, " on the podcast "The Megyn Kelly Show" Oct.
• Kelly Ross Miller, 48, remembers how women often were blamed for what they were wearing or what they were doing if they were assaulted.
• Jody Hunter, 53, was at first afraid to share her #IamJaneDoe story online where she typically posts regarding midlife.

I'm jolted awake at 12: 45 a.m. When my college-aged daughter texts me from a frat house.

Her weekends sometimes commence by pregaming at the house she shares with five girls before ending up at a campus bar. She texts me a photo with her childhood bestie. It's at that moment I think of Jane Doe. I want to reply: Be safe.

I commence doomscrolling concerning the Cornell case which has captivated a nation and now consumes me. A 20-year-old woman, identified in court records only as Jane Doe, began her night drinking with friends and concluded at a fraternity house where she notes she was pressured into doing drugs, then gang raped.

We don't know Jane Doe's name. And it's the lack of that one detail in the alleged gang rape case at Cornell University that matters.

For context, the details we do know are specific and heartbreaking. But her anonymity is what has sparked an online movement that allows me to see my daughter in her. That we know little regarding Jane Doe leaves room for readers to imagine their sister or friend in her situation. They can see someone they love in Jane Doe's story before personal details dribble out, shaping or narrowing their response. 'I was brutalized': Cornell rape allegations, investigation, lawsuit.

Rachel Sanders is a 21-year-old college student who posted #IamJaneDoe on her Instagram account this week. The decision, she notes, was straightforward. Jane Doe could be her.

"We all are her, " she notes. "We don't need to know who this girl is, it doesn't matter."

Meanwhile, the identity of the woman who accused members of a Cornell fraternity of gang raping her in October 2024 was filed as Jane Doe in civil court in September. Her identity is shielded.

This makes the case different from high-profile abuse cases where the public often blames the victim. Once she is identified, her sexual history, her clothes, her photos on socials become part of the story. It's a common tactic applied by defense attorneys and extends to the public.

When Virginia Giuffre Roberts first accused the former Prince Andrew of abuse, she was called a whore. She was blamed since even though she was 17, if she provided someone a massage, maybe she additionally consented to sex? Cassie Ventura Fine was called a gold digger who traded sex for fame with Sean "Diddy" Combs when she accused him of abuse. He was convicted of transportation to engage in prostitution.

Right wing commentator Megyn Kelly has already began. She notes she has seen an image of Jane Doe. (Doe's lawyer informed CNN that she has been targeted with threats over her civil suit.) The men accused have all denied wrongdoing and none have been criminally charged.

Kelly remarked the alleged victim might have "enjoyed" what happened and stated she's "not the most attractive gal, " on the podcast "The Megyn Kelly Show" Oct. 5.

In practice, the hashtag #IamJaneDoe has been viewed more than 65 million times on TikTok. The women say they want to show Jane Doe she isn't alone, that they could be her. They, too, have lived through this. They've been raped, assaulted, dismissed. They've additionally been harassed or informed "it's just a joke."

Gen X women see the case as an example of the world they grew up in, but with a new generation that isn't staying quiet.

"It was the purity culture and people blamed the women, " notes Miller, a former pastor and now career coach who lives in San Diego. "The difficulty here is that someone raped this girl. It had nothing to do with her. It is the choices of the humans around her. End of story." Miller posted #IamJaneDoe on her Instagram account to show solidarity.

Her friends asked if she had been raped. Why else would she post it. "No. I have had uncomfortable things happen around men. But this is regarding showing this could have been anyone and to assist keep her privacy, " she notes.

Jody Hunter, 53, was at first afraid to share her #IamJaneDoe story online where she typically posts regarding midlife. But she knew she had to.

On Oct. 1, she pointed her phone toward herself and began a video. At 21 she was raped in her own house during a party after she'd gone to bed. At 42 she was drugged and sexually assaulted on a work trip. Hunter documented the assault to police, but, she states, her case wasn't pursued. She was Jane Doe.

More than 400, 000 watched her video. Individuals from worldwide shared their stories. Hunter spent the weekend replying to each stranger, using a translator to respond to some. She posted a sexual assault hotline.

"I don't want her to feel alone or for anyone to feel alone, " notes Hunter, who lives in a Detroit suburb. "We have to do something."

Hunter watched the #MeToo movement gain momentum and lose it. This time, she notes, residents can't let it go: "When I informed police what happened 11 years ago, my voice did not matter. Now individuals are listening and for the first time, it feels like it does. I can only hope it leads to change."

She concluded one of her videos with a message for all survivors: "When you speak things, they lose their power. I am Jane Doe. Stay with me."

Let's allow Jane Doe her privacy. Her story is allowing us to tell ours.

If you or someone you know has experienced sexual violence, RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline offers free, confidential, 24/7 backing in English and Spanish via chat and at 800-656-4673.

Laura Trujillo is a national columnist focusing on health and wellness. She is the author of "Stepping Back From the Ledge: A Daughter's Search for Truth and Renewal" and can be reached at [email protected]. Share your feedback to support improve our site!

In short, my daughter texted from a frat house. I thought of Jane Doe is the central thread here, and readers can expect follow-up reporting as the picture becomes clearer.